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Old 08Nov2006, 11:50 AM   #1
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Default The Etiquette of Returning Salaam



we have the 'send salaams' folder which alhamdulillah allows persons to post their first post and so get them accutomed to using the posting forms on the site.

but last night i heard something from a sheykh's lecture that concerns me: that men should not necessary initiate salaam with women and v/v. does this extend to returning salaam?

so should i return the salaam of a sister who just joined (which i've done in the past :( ), or should i leave it for a sister to respond?


any evidences?.. jzk. until then, i don't think i'll get involved when sisters post in that section IA. Perhaps Shanaz (Site Admin) can take it upon herself to respond to the sisters

jzk
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Old 08Nov2006, 10:44 PM   #2
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Extending the salaam to the opposite sex in general
*Please appropriately reference this fatwa to: www.fatwa-online.com, thankyou!*
Question: I am a university student, and sometimes I extend salaam to the female students. So is it halaal or haraam for a male student to extend salaam to his female colleagues at university?

Response: Firstly, it Is not permissible to study with females in one place (together), nor in one school (together), and nor in one class (together), rather this is from amongst the greatest causes of fitnah. So it is not permissible for a male student nor a female student to (free) mix like this for that which exists therein of much fitnah.

As regards extending the salaam, then there is no harm for him to extend the salaam, as is outlined in the Sharee'ah, to her, so long as there is no display of any causes of fitnah. And (likewise), there is no harm for her to extend the salaam to him without shaking hands, because shaking hands between the two ajnabees is not permissible, rather the extending of salaam should be from a distance with/in hijaab and keeping far away from (all) causes of fitnah, and without being alone (together).

So the salaam, as outlined in the Sharee'ah, in which there is no fitnah, there is no harm in (extending) this. As for extending the salaam to her in such a manner as to cause fitnah or her extending salaam to him in such a manner that arouses his desires and excites him in that which Allaah has prohibited, then this is not allowed in the Sharee'ah (i.e. it is prohibited).

And with Allaah lies (all) success.

Shaykh Ibn Baaz
Fataawa Muhimmah li-Nisaa. al-Ummah Page 229


http://www.fatwa-online.com/fataawa/...am/0021119.htm
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Old 08Nov2006, 10:59 PM   #3
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SubhaanAllah.

So between male and female there is no free mixing, and a simple salaam and reply inshaAllah, and no private messaging between male and female (which of course went without saying).

Of course these are allowed between the sisters and between the brothers inshaAllah. I hope that the sisters can really welcome and encourage the other sisters inshaAllah to the site and to the ilm, and likewise the brothers for the brothers.

And indeed with Allaah is all knowledge, الرحمن الرحيم.

Jazakallahu kheyr.
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Sahih al-Bukhari No. 6057. Narrated Aisha (ra):The Prophet was asked, "What deeds are loved most by Allah?" He said, "The most regular constant deeds even though they may be few." He added, 'Don't take upon yourselves, except the deeds which are within your ability." Reciter: al-Ajmy...Surah al-Faatihah - (The Opening: First Chapter of the Quran) (The text) | Ayatul Kursee (reciter: as-Shuraym; Tafseer;)

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Old 09Nov2006, 12:00 AM   #4
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Servant I got a lil info concerning what you asked it is very brief and I don't know if it answers ur question fully concerning if to reply to a sister via her post Allah knows best. Here is what i got

Do not engage in social conversation with persons of the opposite sex

You may choose to greet the muslim with "As sala'amu alaikum," but beyond that, limit your conversation with the opposite sex to business, i.e. only that which is necessary. Muslimahs are not required to greet male muslims.

Muslim men should not be the first to approach conversation with a Muslimah, except out of necessity, i.e. "As sala'amu alaikum. You dropped your $50 dollar bill; here it is."

This includes situations when online... do not engage in "Instant Messages" or Email of a social or personal matter with members of the opposite sex. Make the effort to find out what gender the person is before getting into a personal private discussion.


See The Noble Qur'an: al-Ahzab 32.

http://muttaqun.com/niqab.html
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Old 09Nov2006, 02:27 AM   #5
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Also what is important to mention is the manners of starting the Salaams.

The Prophet (Salallahu alaihi wa sallam) said: "The younger gives salaams to the elderly, and the one who is passing to one who is sitting, and the small in number to the large in number".
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Old 09Nov2006, 10:26 AM   #6
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Servant

That is why I am advocating a sisters section :P
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Old 09Nov2006, 10:41 AM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by shanaz
Servant

That is why I am advocating a sisters section :P

We did the Sisters-only Forum. Set up another one?
http://aa.trinimuslims.com/viewforum.php?f=24
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Sahih al-Bukhari No. 6057. Narrated Aisha (ra):The Prophet was asked, "What deeds are loved most by Allah?" He said, "The most regular constant deeds even though they may be few." He added, 'Don't take upon yourselves, except the deeds which are within your ability." Reciter: al-Ajmy...Surah al-Faatihah - (The Opening: First Chapter of the Quran) (The text) | Ayatul Kursee (reciter: as-Shuraym; Tafseer;)

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Old 29Nov2006, 12:08 AM   #8
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Default Brothers Greeting Sisters

Assalamu alaikum

A person asked Allah's Messenger (SAW) "What (sort of) deeds in or (what qualities of) Islam are good?" He (SAW) replied, "To feed (the poor), and greet those whom you know and those whom you don't know."
Narrated by Abdullah ibn Umar, Sahih Bukhari

Abdullah heard the Prophet (SAW) say: 'O people! Spread the salaams (greetings), feed (the poor and needy), behave kindly to your blood relations, offer prayer when others are asleep, and (thus) enter Paradise in peace.
Narrated by Abu Yusuf Abdullah ibn Salam, At Tirmidhi

In both these ahadith, it is recommended to spread the salam. There is no recommendation that these salams are only for sisters if you are female, or only for brothers if you are male. We really ought to follow the example of the Prophet SAW. He greeted both sisters and brothers, and taught both sisters and brothers, observing the limits of Islam with regard to free mixing of with Non-Mahram sisters. Thus, one can greet sisters with a lowered gaze.

To all the brothers who do not greet Muslim sisters with salam, do you greet non Muslim women with "Good Morning" or "Good Afternoon"? If you would rather not greet your sisters in Islam, shouldn't this apply to the Non-Muslims more so?

Assalamu alaikum to all brothers and sisters!
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Old 06Dec2006, 04:55 AM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by barrs


Servant I got a lil info concerning what you asked it is very brief and I don't know if it answers ur question fully concerning if to reply to a sister via her post Allah knows best. Here is what i got

Do not engage in social conversation with persons of the opposite sex

You may choose to greet the muslim with "As sala'amu alaikum," but beyond that, limit your conversation with the opposite sex to business, i.e. only that which is necessary. Muslimahs are not required to greet male muslims.

Muslim men should not be the first to approach conversation with a Muslimah, except out of necessity, i.e. "As sala'amu alaikum. You dropped your $50 dollar bill; here it is."

This includes situations when online... do not engage in "Instant Messages" or Email of a social or personal matter with members of the opposite sex. Make the effort to find out what gender the person is before getting into a personal private discussion.


See The Noble Qur'an: al-Ahzab 32.

http://muttaqun.com/niqab.html
Wa alaikumu salaam

in applying what was said here then would not some of the topics on the forum fall out of the category of conversations limited to business and in that of social conversation? Or is that only in relation to face to face convos?
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Old 19Mar2007, 01:03 PM   #10
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Default Assalaamu alaikum!

About sending the salaams, im sorry to say the Quraan was neglected in this aspect and none quoted appropriately from it. SubhaanAllah, it should be the first place we look, then to support it with Ahadith.

Refer to Suratu-Nisaa' verse 86: wa ithaa 7huyiitum bita7hiyyatin fa7hayyu bi a7hsana minhaa aw rudduuhaa, inna-llaaha kaana '3alaa kulli shay'in 7hasiiba.

When you are greeted with a greeting, greet in return with what is better than it, or return it equally. Certainly, Allah is Ever a Careful Account Taker of all things.

Also about entering houses there is salaam to be spoken. Refer to Suratu-Nuur verse 27,28 and 29. This surah goes on to talk about lowering of the gazes which is appropriate behaviour for BOTH men and women.

About sending the salaams the ahadith mentioned by our brother and sister are sufficient and if anyone knows where in the Quraan we can find this please let us know InshaAllah because i did not find any.
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Old 17Jun2007, 09:23 PM   #11
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Assalaamu Alaikum =)
So whats the different views on replying when someone walks in and gives salaam while the khutbah is going on?
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Old 18Jun2007, 08:18 AM   #12
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alaikis salaam wa rahmatullaah

From what I know (which is very little), is that it is not permissible to give and return salaam during the khutbah. In fact, I was listening to a lecture a couple days ago when Shaykh Yahyaa Al Haajuree (hafidhahullah) was in Britain, and he gave the Khutbah. A brother entered and gave salaam and another brother replied. And the Shaykh said: "Maybe this why we are losing reward of Jumu'ah..."

Maybe somebody could help me out with the evidences.

Quote:
SubhaanAllah, it should be the first place we look, then to support it with Ahadith.
In terms of legislation, the Qur'aan and the Sunnah are on par. We look at them together, and not one first and then the other second. This is what Shaykh Al Albaanee (rahimahullah) was mentioning with respect to tafseer of the Qur'aan, because both of them are revelation. The Sunnah is the explanation of the Qur'aan i.e. it gives the details. So quoting the Sunnah is not in reality neglecting the Qur'aan. In context, the ayah from Surah An Nisaa': "When you are greeting with a greeting, then return it with a greeting better than it or the like of it."

The 'how' comes from the Sunnah. As demonstrated by the hadeeth, which is reported on the authority of Abu Hurairah and related in Saheeh Muslim: "The young should give salaam to the old. The passer-by to the one sitting, and the small group to the large group."

Imaam Ahmad ibn Hanbal (Rahimahullah) said in his monumental work 'Usoolus Sunnah': "And the Sunnah does tafseer of the Qur'aan."

And he (rahimahullah) was once asked: "Is the Sunnah decisive over the Qur'aan?"

And he replied: "I do not say this, but I say the Sunnah is the explanation of the Qur'aan." aw kama qaal.

Allaah ta'ala knows better.
 
Old 18Jun2007, 05:29 PM   #13
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Default Regarding returning salaams during friday sermon

Bismillahir Rahmaanir Raheem.

MY dear brothers and sisters here are some hadith which indicate the impermissibility of speaking during the Friday sermon (khutbah) as indicated by the rasuul (salla llahu alaihi wa sallam). It also speaks of the reward for keeping silence and what is due upon you is to return the salaam AFTER the salaat as well as to explain to others why the silence should be kept as they may be in a state of ignorance. Also it is prohibited that one should even indicate to others who are speaking during the khutbah to be silent.

Book 004, Number 1867:
Abu-Huraira reported Allah's Apostle (may peace be upon him) as saying: He who took a bath and then came for Jumu'a prayer and then prayed what was fixed for him, then kept silence till the Imam finished the sermon, and then prayed along with him, his sins between that time and the next Friday would be forgiven, and even of three days wore. Sahih Muslim


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Book 004, Number 1868:
Abu Huraira reported Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him) as saying: He who performed ablution well, then came to Friday prayer, listened (to the sermon), kept silence all (his sins) between that time and the next Friday would be forgiven with three days extra, and he who touched pebbles caused an interruption. Sahih Muslim.

Volume 2, Book 13, Number 8:
Narrated Salman-Al-Farsi:

The Prophet (p.b.u.h) said, "Whoever takes a bath on Friday, purifies himself as much as he can, then uses his (hair) oil or perfumes himself with the scent of his house, then proceeds (for the Jumua prayer) and does not separate two persons sitting together (in the mosque), then prays as much as (Allah has) written for him and then remains silent while the Imam is delivering the Khutba, his sins in-between the present and the last Friday would be forgiven." Sahih Bukhaari.


Volume 2, Book 13, Number 56:
Narrated Abu Huraira:

Allah's Apostle (p.b.u.h) said, "When the Imam is delivering the Khutba, and you ask your companion to keep quiet and listen, then no doubt you have done an evil act." Sahih Bukhaari.

InshaAllah i hope this is a more precise and appropriate answer and references to the question asked by the sister.
May Allah forgive us for our sins and grant us hikmah, Ameen.
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